The following is an old post from our GoFundMe account when learned the devastating news that Angelina is still on track for being transferred. Since updates disappear when you post a new updates on that website, I decided to post it here as well because honestly, I love rereading it when I need reassurance. Our Family Sponsorship Program has replaced our GoFundMe account as a place for people to contribute towards Angelina’s adoption. We are incredibly grateful for all the donations; people’s open hearts and pure generosity have left me speechless with gratitude during this challenging time.
Here is a conversation with our 3 year old Della that melted my heart this morning:
Della “Mom, this leopard needs a wheelchair because his leg is hurt just like Angelina’s.”
Me (thinking fast) “Oh! Did your stroller just transform into a wheelchair?!”
Della: “Oh my! Yes it did!!! Don’t worry leopard, here is your wheelchair. Now we can all dance together!”
And then she danced around the room spinning and pushing the stroller and finished by saying
“I’m going to be a good sister for Angelina.”
Yes sweetie, yes you will.
Earlier this week we received worrisome news from our facilitation team in Angelina’s country that it looks like she will still be transferred to a different facility at the end of the summer. Before we realized our family was being called to adopt Angelina, I was already advocating for her because of this ominous phrase on her Reece’s Rainbow profile “may be in an institution soon”. I had been hopeful that we would make it to her before she was transferred but now my husband and I are having to come to terms with the fact that she will probably experience the fear of being transferred and the increased risk for trauma and abuse that comes with being the underdog in a new institution.
In the past week as the fears for Angelina overshadow the normal peace of everyday life, I constantly find myself humming the hymn we as a family are currently learning by heart:
O God, O Lord of heaven and earth,
Thy living finger never wrote that life should be an aimless mote,
A deathward drift from futile birth.
Thy Word meant life triumphant hurled,
In splendor through Thy broken world,
Since light awoke and life began, Thou hast desired Thy life for man.
Our fatal will to equal Thee,
Our rebel will wrought death and night. We seized and used in prideful spite
Thy wondrous gift of liberty.
We housed us in this house of doom,
Where death had royal scope and room
Until Thy servant, Prince of Peace, breached all its walls for our release.
Thou camest to our hall of death,
O Christ, to breathe our poisoned air, to drink for us the dark despair
That strangled our reluctant breath.
How beautiful the feet that trod
The road that leads us back to God! How beautiful the feet that ran
To bring the great good news to man!
O Spirit, who didst once restore
Thy church that it might be again the bringer of good news to men,
Breathe on Thy cloven Church once more,
That in these gray and latter days
There may be those whose life is praise, each life a high doxology
To Father, Son and unto Thee.
While I am sitting here typing this I hear snatches of this eerie tune drifting over from Della’s play kitchen where she is currently making vegetable soup from Mr. McGreggor’s garden to feed to her pretend rabbits. Although the depth of these words may be lost on her, she knows beyond the shadow of a doubt that her life is not a deathward drift from futile birth. We hope one day soon Angelina will be able to lift her voice in prayer and singing alongside her sister. If you want to hear the tune check out this recording only imagine one wispy child’s voice carrying this tune instead of a room full of deep male voices.
O Christ who came to drink for us the dark despair that strangled our reluctant breath, we ask that you protect Angelina during these dark days while we, her parents, can only wait and trust in you so that in these gray and latter days she may be one of those whose life is praise to Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen.